For all you American citizens that have been in the country for more than 6 years:
They made a beautiful debut here in the ol’ US around, what, 2001, and lasted for about 4 years, and then boomf. Gone. Kaput. Pulled from our shelves and cut from our commercials, but never erased from my heart. Oh, the heart ache. How I miss you, little orange M&M character. Red and Yellow are such camera whores, I’ve got your back little buddy.
These candies were AWESOME. I don’t particularly enjoy M&M’s all too much, but the crispy version in their spiffy little blue bags were enough to make a fan out of me. We bonded, the candy and I. We shared laughs, cries, memories, and a bit of our souls. Why would the Mars company pull them? WHY?? And to add salt to our wounds, they dare to try and later woo us with some pretzel M&M bull. We already have chocolate covered mini pretzels that come in snack size bags, why would I even try these things? It’s like telling a kid to downgrade to a razor scooter when he’s already bought a car. There’s just no point. It’s downright insulting.
From what I hear, these crispy M&M’s are still sold in other parts of the world, such as Australia. Well, after all the crap that Australia has gone through this year like cyclones… flooding… more cyclones and flooding… earthquakes… probably more cyclones… I say they deserve it. Yeah, why not. Pat yourself on the back and grab a well deserved bag of crispy M&M’s, Australians, for not only surviving in a place where a dozen animals could kill you on sight, but for making it through tropical storms the size of our own damn country.
Which, by the way, is in serious need of some crispy M&M’s right now. Rumors float around the internet about these delectable candies making a comeback in the US this year. Dare I hope? Dare I dream?